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AN Confessions of An Airplane Nut Part 2 - Becoming a Pilot The life of a nut (AN that is) is a series of ups and downs (pun intended.) Unfortunately the ups don’t always involve a ride in an airplane. In fact, this addition of the fable is all about the downs caused by waiting for the ups to happen. I think that I alluded earlier-on that a significant stage of this odyssey will be actually learning to fly rather than spending my life bumming rides from people who are getting tired of seeing me coming. Well, events have finally come together to allow me to take that leap and GET STARTED taking actual flying lessons. Now I realize that for most of you this event exists somewhere back in the dim past but, for me, it is right now at 56 years old. In case you don’t remember that far back, this is stomach squeezing, legs trembling, bladder full, dry mouth, sweaty palms time. Just thinking about that first flight as Pilot In Command (PIC) brings a tremor to the old fingers. (Any typos are therefore excusable OK?) Well, as of the day I write this (2-16-06), it’s still a dream as I will explain. You are all aware that it is quite possible for a person to obtain a driver’s license for a multi-ton vehicle with little more medical review than: “OK you don’t seem to be drunk or on drugs right now.” However, to prove yourself safe to fly a private plane carrying perhaps as little as 5-6 gallons of gas, you have to pass a medical that would make a space shuttle pilot proud. And that’s only a 3rd class medical. They must have to totally tear you apart and rebuild you (“We can rebuild him, we have the technology.” - $6 million man) to qualify for a 1st class medical. Anyway, that turned into a 2-week ordeal involving two doctors, several staff members at the Medical Center, and 3 trips to Hutchinson to the only doctor in a 30-mile radius who is willing to deal with that FAA fawl-du-ral (technical term for bureaucracy.) Success – 3rd class medical in hand; time for smooth sailing . . . NOT! Before you can take lessons, even if you have a good friend (Janine for later reference) with the proper ratings who is willing to give you lessons for free, you have to find an available airplane. That shouldn’t be such a big deal as the airport is just full of them and it’s not the only airport around either. *** Insurance – who needs insurance? I don’t plan on pranging (British slang – neat huh?) your bird. Oh, not just insurance for the plane but also for the instructor and the soon-to-be Top Gun. Well, OK *** HOW MUCH per hour? You’ve got to be kidding! A full half-inch of paper to fill out for the soon to be PIC, and a second slightly larger pile for the instructor which lists every tenth of an hour of her 1,000+ hours as an instructor. Can’t be too careful. Forget all of that sour grapes sniveling. It’s now 2-19-06 and I just got back on the ground from my first 1.1 hours as PIC of a private aircraft. That was the most intense, gut clenching, exhilarating, scary, FUN 1.1 hours of my life. I can’t believe that I have to endure a whole week of meetings and the regular daily grind before I get to do it again. I, me, myself, got to take off, wheel, soar, swing through the high un-trespassed sanctity of space, etc., etc., AND LAND, while completely (well almost) in command of a real airchine. (That’s air machine for you ground pounders.) I was sooo graceful. (Keep the nose up. Watch your altitude. Turn, left – no your other left. No that’s push in for fast and pull out for slow.) It was just like I had been doing this my whole life. (NOOO, you steer on the ground with your FEET. Use the rudder and ailerons together. The runway’s over there – we don’t plan to land sideways. “Cessna Radio this is McPherson 327 – uh, I mean McPherson Radio this is Cessna 327” – what are we doing again? – oh yeah – “turning base for 18”. I can’t believe they let us fly over the oil refinery. That’s OK, they might not if they knew it was you doing the flying.) Why, oh why isn’t there a public bathroom open at the airport on Sundays? I have a flying friend who told me that his knees shook for the first three flights. I hope he didn’t mean that they shook for the entire time between those first three flights too. Mine are still shaking some and we’ve been down for three hours now. Since you are reading this, you are well aware that I am not making this journey by myself. I have my entire readership (both of you) as well as my EAA Chapter (1344), fellow Municipal Center workers, Sunday School class and small group (we call them TLC groups in our church) keeping up with events as they unfold. That does two good things for me. 1) It makes me want to do it right. (Who wants that many people watching you do it wrong?) That means that I listen to my instructor in “pay attention” mode AND I read my ground materials with the idea of learning the material, not just passing a test. 2) Secondly, I receive copious amounts of good wishes and goodwill. That’s both pleasant and humbling. It’s not hard to remember that I have waited 56 years for this moment (not always patiently) and there are others with the same dream who are still in that period of waiting. Why did it take so long for things to work out for me to learn to fly? Why did things change at this particular time in my life? I haven’t the slightest idea BUT I do know who does and that makes all the difference. Remember those Bible verses I told you about in chapter 1? Well, here is one that brings it all together for me. “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for wholeness and not for evil, to give you hope and a future.” Jeremiah 29:11 May your life be as blessed as mine has been, and I hope to see you back here for the next installment in a month or so. (By the way, the above conversations were totally made up. Janine was unfailingly polite but strict with never a hint of sarcasm.) Tom Stinemetze The Airplane Nut ____
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